How to Hack Your Brain to Help You Stick to Your New Habits
Making new habits is hard. In fact, it's so hard that most people give up after just a few days. But it doesn't have to be that way! There are plenty of strategies you can use to help you stick to your new habits and achieve your goals. In this blog post, we will discuss eight of the most effective strategies for staying accountable and making lasting change.
We're certified Habit Coaches by Dr. BJ Fogg and his Tiny Habits system. You may have heard of his New York Times Bestselling book, Tiny Habits: The Small Changes that Change Everything. He also runs the Behavior Lab at Stanford University, which is dedicated to researching habit formation.
Also, we run a service call Shelpful, where we pair you with a real-human buddy to help you stick with whatever habits or routines are important to you. In helping hundreds of people, we've seen what works and what doesn't when it comes to accountability.
The below tips are supported by Dr. BJ Fogg’s research on how to form habits and wire them in to stick with you.
Here are 5 proven tips for staying accountable to new habits:
1. Identify habits that you really WANT to do.
This is important because you're more likely to stick with habits that you actually enjoy or see the benefits of. If you're trying to force yourself to do something that you hate, it's going to be a lot harder to stay accountable.
2. Pull yourself out of the Shame Spiral.
A big part of keeping a habit is feeling good. In fact, a key maxim outlined by Dr. BJ Fogg is to help people Feel Successful. When you feel good, you are sending a message to your brain that this is a behavior worth repeating.
But when you mess up, it's easy to fall into the shame spiral- that feeling of "I'm never going to be able to do this" which can lead to giving up entirely. So if you do slip up, how can you brush it off and get back on track as soon as possible? We think having a buddy or someone to lean on can help with this. If you can say to someone: "I'm really trying to do _____, but I messed up ARGGHHH." It helps to even say it. But that person can also help you feel heard, and also can help you come up with a back up plan. Maybe it's not exactly the same as your original plan, but just feeling like you showed up for yourself can make all the difference. Of course, this is something we see a lot at Shelpful.
3. Lower the bar for success by making the habit TINY
When it comes to making new habits, it can be daunting. But one of the best ways to stay accountable and stick with new habits is to make them tiny. This means breaking down our goals into small, achievable tasks that are easier for us to accomplish AND feel good about it.
That feeling of success is what wires the habit into your brain. So by lowering the bar for success, we are more likely to stay on track and maintain our new habit.
Pro Habit Builders will feel very successful for doing VERY tiny habits like:
Putting on one walking shoe
Turning on your exercise bike
Flossing one tooth
Getting a water glass out of the cabinet
Turning on the tea kettle
Getting out your day-planner
Opening your laptop
And when you allow yourself to feel successful for the small version, then you don’t badger yourself when don’t have time to do the “extra credit” or larger version of the habit.
4. Make a plan (an Implementation Intention)
An Implementation Intention is basically a plan for when and how you're going to do your new habit. When it comes to new habit formation, a lot of people tend to go in without a plan. And we get it – you're excited about this new habit! But if you want to increase your chances of success, it's important to make a plan before you start.
In the book, Atomic Habits, author James Clear notes there are hundreds of studies have shown that if we create a plan for how we will achieve our goals, we are more likely to succeed. Researchers have found that voter turnout increases when people are forced to create implementation intentions. This means answering questions such as: "What route are you taking to the polling station? At what time are you planning to go? What bus will get you there?"
In our habit world, we like to ask you your plan "how? when? where?" but even better: We ask you to make a habit recipe. The recipe looks like this:
After I __{anchor/existing habit}__, I will ___{do my new tiny habit}__
We take an existing behavior, then attach a new habit to it. And, we make the habit super small. For example: "After I set my toothbrush down, I will floss one tooth." Let's dig more into why we make it small!)
Dr. Fogg's system has been proven to be effective time and time again, and we learned directly from him and his sister, Linda Fogg Phillips who trains new coaches. The idea behind Tiny Habits is to make new habits so small, you don't need motivation to do them - because it's easy! This way, new habits become automatic and done with little effort.
5. Get an Accountability Partner
Finally, getting an accountability partner can be one of the best ways to stay accountable and stick to new habits. It's easy to fall off track when it's just you trying new habits- but with someone else by your side, they can help keep you motivated and on track.
You can find an accountability partner in your community or online communities. Or you can find one through shelpful. Shelpful pairs you with a real-human buddy who texts with you throughout the day. You can share your task list with them, and they update it as you get things done. They follow up on those tasks so they don't fall off your list. You can create new habits with their support, and they keep you accountable to sticking with them. We make sure to stay positive, so that new habit formation feels good!
The shame-game has been proven to not be the best way to build habits. Feeling good and successful is what wires in the habits. So, shelpers (the accountability buddies at Shelpful) are all about cheering you on and finding a way through life's hurdles.
So there you have it. 5 ways to help your brain wire in new habits. Remember: start small, ask for help when needed, lower the bar for success, make a plan, and get an accountability partner. Good luck new habit builders!